Proud Parents of Brody Paine

We haven't completely settled on a middle name yet and the first name has changed a couple times, but the pictures are still super cute. Click on the picture to see more

From  Brody - The Early Days (click to see the album)

A beautiful wife with a beautiful belly

From Big Belly .. ...

My prose can't compare to those of my beautiful wife, but I can spice up my meandering words with some gorgeous pictures of her. We took these photos on Sunday morning and as you can see her belly is HUGE. Two weeks ago I never would have believed that she could grow any more, but the belly keeps up it's pace with incredible inevitability. It's to the point where I feel the need to file a flight plan whenever I want to get around her.

From Big Belly .. ...

The inevitability of becoming a father is really settling in firmly now. With little more than a week until her "due" date I can no longer find solace in the broad expanse of time between now and the birth of my child. Nope, it's now days away and I'm still completely unprepared. Not that I should have expected anything else. Quite a few people have expressed surprise that Carrie and I, as young as we are, have found ourselves ready to take on the great burden of parenthood. My response is usually something along the lines of "Are you ever prepared for such a big decision? If we waited until we were completely ready we wouldn't have kids until our late 30's." So what did I expect? That some sort of deep understanding would settle over me by being in close proximity to our growing baby? Silly, I know, but as long as the date of birth is some distant future it's easy to assume that the fear will magically go away. Yet this is what I proclaimed 8 months ago to those who could not understand our bravado. We simply have to jump in head first, eyes wide open to our decisions, but jump we must.

/* BEGIN RANT */

Much of the past 9 months have been spent educating ourselves about the myriad of choices we have before us. Whether it's home birth, co-sleeping, circumcision or schooling there seems be much controversy at every turn. The AMA wants to make home birth illegal, and the state of New York is telling parents that sleeping in the same bed as your baby is dangerous. Of course the AMA is just reacting to recent criticism of the birthing industry in America and the state of New York is more concerned about drunk, overly medicated or simply neglecting parents. Yet these are the institutions that are supposed to be guiding our society by providing us with information with which we can make an informed decision. Instead they condescend to take that decision away from us by claiming that there are no choices, there is only their way. This is my basic gripe with institutions like the AMA and the medical industry in general. We are not stupid sheep that need to be told how to put our pants on in the morning. Just because one group of people is armed with more information it does not mean that the rest of us are ignorant.

/* END RANT */

Ok, thanks, I feel much better now. Anyway, be sure to check out the rest of our photos. We took some pictures on 35mm so when we get those developed I'll add some of them to the collection.


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Now playing: Sufjan Stevens - Casimir Pulaski Day

July has come... finally... and the countdown begins

My body is officially no longer my own. I feel my consciousness has been high jacked, torn from its rightful place in a world of coherent meaning and stuck in shared temporary housing. The other occupant being my unborn child creates that much more complexity as I joyfully hobble about in the discomfort of the heat. I can no longer see my toes while standing up and have to contort both belly and neck to get a glimpse of my belly button. But even my belly button is smiling as it is stretched into this new state of being.

Santa Barbara in June is usually socked in fog and months ago I anticipated this usually unpleasant state of being with some relief. However Thomas, whose ability to manifest even the most unthinkable state of affairs like the weather, has brought us a thoroughly sunny June and now July has come and the sun is sure to stick around. This crowded body is roasting to the core and I all I can do is request a light breeze from the weather gods and perhaps a little patience from those around me as I slip into frequent bouts of disgruntled behavior.

The baby is still growing and very active. We have three weeks until the impending due date arrives; however I keep telling it at this point its welcome anytime. We’re ready when it is. Although the house is a mess and there is no sign of that “nesting” instinct yet to whip it into shape, but all in due time. I’m just so excited about going into labor, meeting our new baby and starting our new life that I can’t really focus on any one thing these days. I’ve stopped cooking almost completely and I don’t know where my phone could be located; I’m lost in another world completely and it’s fully of hummingbirds, art projects, meditation and long afternoon naps. Kind of blissful actually, like a circling a star while floating suspended in space or spinning until you’re dizzy.